The just-us time
A daily moment that is only theirs, with a name of its own
Learning through play
Since the baby arrived, your older little one keeps count all day: how much I get, how much they get. This ritual gives them a certainty they do not have to earn: a daily, short, named moment when they have you all to themselves. In that time they are in charge and you follow — and that predictability is worth more than an odd hour now and then.
By age: At 2-3, the time is pure play led by them; at 4-6, add the "big-sibling job" that makes them feel grown-up.
What you’ll need
- ·Nothing: just the two of you, without the baby nearby
Getting ready
Find the fixed slot of the day and who stays with the baby. That is all.
How it goes, step by step
- 1
Choose together the name of your time (the "Emma-and-mummy time")
- 2
Set a fixed hour every day, even if it is ten minutes
- 3
In that time they are in charge: they choose the game and you follow
- 4
Always close the same way: "there is more tomorrow, because this time is ours"
- 5
Give them a big-sibling job as well that makes them feel grown-up
Safety
Never cancel the time as a punishment: it is food for the bond, not a reward that is won or lost.
Your tool for the moment
Short and daily beats long and now and then. And when jealousy shows up, name it without alarm: "you wanted arms just now" — they can love the baby and be angry with them at the same time.
The phrase they keep
«The baby is here. I am still yours. The heart stretches.»
The pedagogical why
A new sibling stirs up attachment; regression and jealousy are normal. Guaranteed individual time, a valued role and avoiding comparisons protect the bond and reduce rivalry.
Honestly: The time does not remove the jealousy — it is part of the process —: it gives it a channel so it does not have to come out as an elbow to the baby.
Source: AAP HealthyChildren, Preparing Your Child for a New Sibling; Laurie Kramer, individual time
Grounded in developmental psychology and citable sources. It does not replace a professional’s assessment; if anything worries you, talk to your paediatrician.
What you get
- 1
The activity’s audio guide in Tilo’s voice, step by step
- 2
The everyday materials you’ll need — nothing to buy
- 3
The illustrated story and its audio story for this same situation
- 4
The Moment’s song, made to measure
- 5
The family guide: how to hold the play, and the rest of the week, from a calm place
Digital delivery by email. The confirmed delivery window will be shown before payment.
The story that plants it
The heart that stretches
Jealousy of the new sibling
The just-us time
A daily moment that is only theirs, with a name of its own
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